Accused of trying to con Nando’s!

I am furious! Absolutely bloody furious with Nando’s. For those who may not know, Nando’s is a chain of Peri-Peri chicken restaurants, it’s a relatively cheap and cheerful way of having a half-decent family lunch out and we go fairly frequently.

Now, Nando’s have a loyalty card scheme which is a jolly good thing except that — as I discovered today — it is the most barking-mad, badly thought out, mind-numbingly stupid loyalty card scheme that the planet Earth may have ever seen!

My Nando’s loyalty card

Upon my arrival today, the card had been filled in to the point of Number 6. To any normal, rational human being, this would suggest that — having previously paid for six meals at Nando’s — I was now eligible to receive a free (gratis, no charge to the ol’ Visa sir!) half chicken, made using the Nando’s Peri-Peri baste to my requirements. I handed my card to Marta at the Southampton branch of Nando’s only to be told that I had clearly already had my free half chicken!.

Naturally, I pointed out the error of her position and there then ensued a brief but robust discussion in which I ended up pointing out to her that I did not appreciate being accused of lying in order to try to hoodwink a free half chicken out of Nando’s. She then sought the assistance of her colleague, Adam who eventually told her to put it through the till for free. They then both proceeded to tell me, in a completely patronising manner, that I ought to be more careful next time to ensure I used the card correctly. The card was then returned to me, with Number 7 now also filled in. The whole thing also took longer than was needed because neither Marta nor Adam appeared to have a reasonable grasp on the way the English language functions meaning that they could neither understand fully what I was saying nor adequately express their position. Now, I’ve nothing at all against people coming to this country and working — I am a pukka Liberal — but it seems like a basic principle of working in a service industry that one ought to at least be able to converse with one’s customers!

So, why am I so furious? Well, firstly, I do not appreciate being accused in this way. Secondly, the Nando’s loyalty card is clearly moronic. It ought to be the case that one chooses whether to save three, six or ten meals worth of stamps/signatures in order to obtain a free quarter, half or whole chicken. But no, it would seem that on the way to having accumulated ten meals, one should get both a quarter and and half chicken before finally obtaining the legendary free whole chicken — and one is bound to do so. I have been denied my free quarter chicken because of the downright stupid way the card works. Furthermore, when I get to the whole chicken, this is going to be a waste of food as not even I am able to consume an entire chicken on my own and Amanda doesn’t eat food on the bone. Thirdly, the people at Nando’s today were clearly of the opinion that I had been attempting an elaborate con in order to obtain that greatest of prizes — a free half chicken — and had decided to let me have it just to make their lives easier. There was a time when the customer was right. That time appears to have passed at Nando’s and this is a real shame.

So, sorry Nando’s, you suck and I’m appalled!